000			02984cam a2200385 i 4500
001			on1342102346
003			OCoLC
005			20231109123053.0
008			220826s2023 cau 000 0aeng d
040			_aYDX _beng _erda _cYDX _dBDX _dKTP _dGO6 _dEHH _dTXSPI _dNYP _dORX _dOCLCF _dOCLCO _dNFG
020			_a9781647424220 _q(softcover) : _c$17.95
020			_a1647424224 _q(softcover) : _c$17.95
035			_a(OCoLC)1342102346
043			_an-us---
092			_aDEIGNAN, A. _bD324
049			_aNFGA
100	1		_aDeignan, Antonia, _eauthor.
245	1	0	_aUnderwater daughter : _ba memoir of survival and healing / _cAntonia Deignan.
264		1	_aBerkley, CA : _bShe Writes Press, _c2023.
264		4	_c©2023
300			_a257 pages ; _c22 cm
336			_atext _btxt _2rdacontent
337			_aunmediated _bn _2rdamedia
338			_avolume _bnc _2rdacarrier
520			_aTuni's father began sexually abusing her when she was just four years old. Her mother, though aware of the abuse, was a silent witness--one either incapable or unwilling to intervene--and the abuse continued until Tuni was eleven. Three years later, when Tuni was fourteen, she was raped by an adult actor who was part of her cast in a professional theater production. These traumas would go on to shape much of her life. Underwater Daughter follows how Tuni grappled with her relationship with her parents, the aftermath of her rape, an eating disorder, drug and alcohol excesses, and shame as she came of age and began to build a life. In order to not lose her inner innocence, in order to protect herself, in order to believe in love, she began early on to create imaginary worlds into which she could escape--to use dreams to transport her away from her fears. By early adulthood, she was well practiced at slapping lipstick (pink, frosty, kiss-me, gloss-over, perfect lipstick) over whatever darkness might be bubbling beneath. Hired by a dance company right out of high school, she found success as a dancer in Chicago and New York, but in her personal and emotional life, she continued to struggle. Ultimately, it took her decades of dancing, hiding, faking, fucking, costuming, implanting, dissociating, marrying, divorcing, and purging--all while staying silent about her past trauma--before a bike accident at age fifty-five forced her to stop and truly take stock of her life. As she did, she came to a resting place, finally, in regard to her father; developed the loving relationship she'd always wanted with her mother; and came to understand that, in the end, love is all anyone wants--or needs.
600	1	0	_aDeignan, Antonia.
650		0	_aAdult child sexual abuse victims _zUnited States _vBiography. _9122822
650		0	_aRape victims _zUnited States _vBiography. _9161928
650		0	_aDrug abuse. _9209907
650		0	_aPsychic trauma. _910884
650		0	_aForgiveness. _9119298
650		0	_aMothers and daughters. _911992
650		0	_aCreative nonfiction.
994			_aC0 _bNFG
999			_c376196 _d376196